30 Teams in 30 Days

San Francisco Giants: If They Only Had One Major League Quality Hitter...

(Over the next 30 days, BERNing on Sports will be previewing every team in the Majors, yes, even the Royals. Only one a day, every day, so try not to get too hooked)

Keeping It Real

This team's lineup is so f**cking bad, it's not even funny. Well, maybe a little funny. Though, to be honest, it was funnier a few years ago, when it looked like something out of Ken Griffey baseball game. Now, it's just sad. Why this team refused to go out and get a hitter, either via free agency or trading on of their million quality starting pitchers, I have no idea. I mean, come on already. Bengie Molina as the cleanup hitter? If this is Brian Sabean's idea of a joke, he really has one twisted sense of humor. The rest of the lineup (if it's possible) only gets less intimidating. The staff, as was the case with the D-backs as Eddie pointed out, is the only reason this team will remain competitive. Tim Lincecum is obviously legit, Matt Cain doesn't win too much (but who would when your team refuses to score for you) but he's pretty good, and Randy Johnson may still be a miserable SOB, but he should be OK in the Bay. Actually, as bad as the Diamondback's lineup is, consider that it scored 80 runs more than the Giants. Yes, the G-men are that bad.

Not One Offensive Player Remotely Scares Me

Aaron Rowand has had two seasons where he was a powerful hitter. Outside of that, nothing much. Then again, that's more than Mr. September, Pablo Sandoval, can say and he's scheduled to bat third. Randy Winn's rarely been a bad player, but, nothing worth worrying over. Same goes for Edgar Renteria, especially at this point in his career. You could go on and on. The problem is, there's no real big hitting prospect on this team. Matt Wieters ain't walking through that door, folks. So, for now, the Giants will have to hope that scoring under 4 runs a game will be good enough.

I'm Sorry, But One More Note Regarding How Poor Hitting Is In This Division

Four of the five teams in the division (damn you Colorado!) ranked in the bottom 11 in the league as far as runs scored is concerned. The only team to score fewer runs than the Giants? The Padres. Only a few spots above the Giants? The Dodgers. Go and get some hitters! These other divisions seem to have a bunch of them. Figure a way to get them to your division.

Beach Boys

If this Brian Wilson switched with this Brian Wilson, but put up similar numbers, would anyone outside of San Francisco even notice the difference. I mean, how many of you would be able to identify this Brian Wilson if he walked into the room you're in right now?

What Will Tiny Tim Do For An Encore?

So much for not being tall enough, not being big enough, having to funky of a delivery. Tim Lincecum lit it up all year last year, leading the NL in K's, while coming in the top 3 in wins, innings pitched, and ERA. His acting might not be Oscar-worthy, and his game may be downright terrible (go and get The Show if you're in the market for a baseball video game), but the 2009 Cy Young winner seems like he's the real thing. Not that anyone in the Bay Area is really surprised by this, but the question now is, what can he do to top it? Probably not a lot, and you'd have to expect his win total to shrink, if only because the law of averages says that such a terrible offense will wind up letting you down more often than not.

Bold Predictions

Matt Cain, not Tim Lincecum, will lead the Giants in wins this year.

Emmanuel Burriss, now officially the 2B for the Giants, will steal at least 35 bases this year.

For the second year in a row, not one Giant will hit 20 or more home runs. Last guys to do it? Pete Happy and Barry Bonds in 2007.

30 Teams in 30 Days

Detroit Tigers: Didn't This Team Play In The Series A Few Years Ago?
(Over the next 30 days, BERNing on Sports will be previewing every team in the Majors, yes, even the Royals. Only one a day, every day, so try not to get too hooked)

Keeping it Real
What the hell happened to this team? Wasn't it 2006 (I believe that just two seasons ago) when the Tigers were in the World Series? I think so. Though, the remnants left on this team may not give that impression. First off, they realized they didn't make out nearly as well as they thought they did with that Marlins trade. While Miguel Cabrera did hit the snot out of the ball in the second half last year, he had to move to his fourth position in four years (with DH in the near future). Dontrelle Willis simply isn't a major league caliber starter anymore. He has lost the ability to throw strikes. I wish I had a funnier way to say it. When he was sent down last year, he didn't go to AAA, but instead to Single A Lakeland. Yes, the same D-Train that won 22 games just three short years ago. Then, Justin Verlander decided he also was no longer effective as his ERA jumped a full run and suddenly that live arm lost some zip. Joel Zumaya was unable to stay healthy, and Fernando Rodney was unfortunately too healthy for any Tigers fan liking. There weren't many changes made, so if you're a Tigre fan, you've gotta be hoping for a bunch of career revivals.

Offensive Defense
The Tigers posted the 6th worst fielding percentage in the entire league last year. It's no surprise that with clowns like Cabrera and Carlos Guillen and Edgar Renteria tooling around. Brandon Inge and Adam Everett should help things, but then again, having those two in your everyday lineup has its obvious disadvantages. Ideally, your best players could hit and play defense but...

D-Train D-Railed
I touched on it before, but this guy has completely lost it. In a matter of two seasons, his ERA has jumped by nearly 6 full runs. Think about that. Then, consider that he walked 35 guys in just 24 innings last year. Next, think about how he was sent down to the minor leagues to not just clear his head, but work on his mechanics. Think about that, if you still have room mentally. Willis just looks like he's lost all command of what ever it was he did effectively. He's put on weight, lost tons of velocity, and seems to be en route to become just another one or two year wonder.

What Closer Will Make Tigers Fans Go Grey This Year
Last year it was Fernando Rodney for stretches, Todd Jones for others. Neither was a safe bet, as the pair combined to lose 7 games, and walk 48 batters in 82 innings. Jones' career has always been nothing short of a complete mystery, from how he got people out over his career to why he continued to be allowed to write a column for the Sporting News. Rodney's just not cut out to handle 9th inning duties, as is evidenced by the fact that despite opponents hitting under .230 against him, his ERA was barely under 5. Brought in to the "rescue" was Brandon Lyon, who had a great 1st half (19 saves, under 3 ERA) and an awful second half (7 saves, over 8 ERA). If you've seen any of these guys pitch, you could imagine how terrible this will be to watch unfold.

Bold Predictions
Jim Leyland will be so annoyed by his team that at some point this year that he'll just light up and smoke a cigarette. In the dugout, or walking to the mound to make a pitching change, it'll happen.

I can't take credit for this one entirely, nor can I explain it. But I can say that the explanation I was given was quite convincing, so I'll repeat it here: Armando Galarraga, after a nice breakout year, will come crashing back to reality.

Up Next...Sunday, Phillies